A King’s Bounty on the heads of these developers


(Okay, that’s an overstatement.)

Over the Christmas break, I found the Platinum Edition of the King’s Bounty series at EB. I’m assuming Platinum relates only to the original, because the sequel, Armoured Princess (AP for short) had cover art that ensured I saw a copy sitting in my local EB for six months without anyone picking it up.

Cover art digression: why would anyone think the cover art for AP was a good idea? If you’ve never seen it, suffice to say that a better name might be “Barely Armoured Princess”. I’ve seen more reliable protective gear on female Final Fantasy characters. This makes it very hard for anyone with a functional sense of shame to pick it up. “Hi. I’m Bob. I’m very lonely. I’d like to buy this game with the cover art that verges on softcore pornography please.”

Anyway, once installed on my admittedly ancient laptop, it proceeded to complain that AP had been installed without important files. Why do games companies do this? What is the point of releasing a game without all the important files attached? Unless there’s some really good reason I’m missing, it strikes me as a sign of gross incompetence.

But classic King’s Bounty works, right? Right?

Kinda.

It loaded. It allowed me to go through character creation (which had one mechanical choice and two fluff) and watch the introductory infodumpery. Then it froze up. The second time I tried it crashed my computer.

After that I got a refund. So in the end, thanks guys, that was a total waste of time.

– OSM out

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Filed under Randomness, Rants

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